Terrible Reign of Santa, John Waters Edition

Well, I imagine most children in Baltimore are on the verge of emotional collapse as it is, if John Waters movies and The Wire have taught me anything, so it's only natural for Santa to push them over the edge:

Terrible Reign of Santa, Twin Cities Edition

You'd think that, since they live so close to Santa, children from Minnesota would handle the encounter better. Sadly, no: the terror of Santa lives within us all:

Terrible Reign of Santa, Beantown Edition

Heading back to the east coast, Boston.com has provided people a place to send their Santa photos...they have all kinds, but, of course, people would prefer to share photos of their kids screaming:

Terrible Reign of Santa, "Show Me" Edition

Once again, Santa is wreaking his havoc on the children of this great nation -- this time: Kansas City!

Terrible Reign of Santa, Flatlander Edition

Not to be outdone, Chicago has put up their own gallery of Santa horrors for you to put you in the Christmas spirit:

The Terrible Reign of Santa

It's that time of year, kids: you're only a couple years old, your parents are promising you presents if you're good, but before that can happen, you are going to be handed over to a costumed horror who will interrogate you about your behavior. And that's after being tortured by standing in line for an hour while watching other kids screaming at the guy as well. Ah, the life of a shopping mall Santa:

Merry Christmas, Neonatal Ward!

I couldn't hold on to this until next Christmas -- what a disturbingly cheery way to express Christmas, from lee ki seung: