tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-25790841389693087992009-12-31T10:16:00.463-06:00Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.comBlogger180125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-86109717989365157582009-12-31T10:16:00.001-06:002009-12-31T10:16:00.760-06:00

She taps my shoulder, because I'm laughing so hard at the computer. I take off my headphones, she asks what it is, so I unplug the headphones to allow the sound to fill the room. She, sadly, was not as amused.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-36700170874660734652009-12-29T08:02:00.004-06:002009-12-29T08:11:49.675-06:00

You know I love Banksy, and Simon Cowell does now, too, thanks to a million-dollar gift from Santa. Cowell got the above artwork by Banksy, a poorly photoshopped version of Degas' Dance Class At The Opera, with the bitchy American Idol judge included, ready to release a deluge of insulting cruelty on the Victorian ballerina before him. Maybe she can come back next year, after getting some

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-19042832990755925102009-12-04T18:22:00.003-06:002009-12-04T18:38:10.323-06:00

If you see one of these today, let me know. I, um, lost them, and, er, want them back.DARPA are offering a big cash prize to anyone who can correctly list the GPS coordinates of these red balloons. I can only gather that, in the interest of making it difficult, one or more will be here in North Dakota, so I'll be keeping my eyes open. The game is designed to test the reliability of information

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-70789810478454276702009-12-01T07:14:00.004-06:002009-12-01T07:22:53.219-06:00

English teachers at Ben Franklin Junior High in Fargo, only a block away from this sign, must be patting themselves on the back. Some students actually paid attention on anagram day:I'm not sure what they did with the extra 'R' when rearranging 'APT FOR RENT', but they did 'fix' both sides the same way.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-57196406256063875752009-11-27T17:33:00.000-06:002009-11-27T17:33:00.237-06:00

The photo on the left has been passed around the internet for a while, causing much consternation about how the guy could even walk in those pants without looking like a goofball. Now that we've got the diagram on the right, things make much, much more sense:

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-63948209423735750762009-11-25T23:29:00.000-06:002009-11-26T00:04:54.807-06:00

Either the shrooms are taking hold, or this pharmacist screwed up my prescription again."Huh? Oh, yeah - Marlboros, hard pack. Sorry, was I staring?"

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-14940826147453515092009-11-24T08:12:00.000-06:002009-11-24T08:12:00.195-06:00

National Geographic asked all 100 US senators to draw a map of their state, including at least three points of interest. Dick Durbin of Illinois included Chicago (home of Obama and the Bears), Springfield (Home of Abe Lincoln and Durbin himself; no mention of the Simpsons) -- and Metropolis, home of Superman. Cute, funny, but before you start to rant about Durbin being a jackass when Nat Geo

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-2598137909367021182009-11-11T07:53:00.003-06:002009-11-22T08:28:27.060-06:00

When you want to get your dog into the country, but avoid those pesky quarantine rules, what do you do? Put the dog in your carry-on, and hope security isn't watching the x-ray machine. Sadly, they were watching.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-8252634782934284072009-10-06T06:49:00.002-05:002009-10-06T06:55:00.864-05:00

James Lileks knows how to get right to the pulse of the football fan: interview a creature that can only speak in grunts and whines:I suppose that's about as good as trying to talk to a Bears fan, anyway.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-84780936645375266082009-09-23T15:42:00.005-05:002009-09-23T15:47:24.285-05:00

Facebook's RECAPTCHA is psychic: how'd they know my favorite rapper was Shorty Bigamist? He's a white, Episcopalian salesman who has a couple kids in Houston, a couple in St Louis, but calls Chicago his home - most of his raps are about the difficulty of scheduling around three Christmases, or the advantage of using the same cute nickname for all three wives:

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-26488980859272773642009-08-07T21:41:00.000-05:002009-08-07T21:41:00.667-05:00

More for my Milwaukee Harley-owning friends, here's a way to get your kid started young - "Because hes got no drivers license and because of his own room being the only safe district, he needs a hybrid of chopper and rocking horse. With this machine he could learn to keep his balance and most of all to sit on it in easy position. So he closes his eyes and his arms broad."Made by Felix Götze

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-64429820390440644922009-07-21T10:27:00.000-05:002009-07-21T10:27:00.311-05:00

Few creatures of burden were of more use to the Empire than the Giant Chipmunk. It's too bad those parts of the movie were cut. Better than those damn Ewoks.The above photo is not a photoshop. Photographer Chris McVeigh, rather than doing his laundry or solving world peace, devoted his spare time to training his neighborhood wild squirrels to tolerate being photographed with toys. When

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-57370937730574534632009-07-19T13:42:00.000-05:002009-07-19T13:42:00.172-05:00

Oh, the humanity! The crash started a small file, engulfing the community with the savory flavor of the finest beef sausages ever made by mankind.Sorry, no, there was no fire. Left in drive, the wienermobile wrangler stepped on the gas and lept forward into the house when she tried to back up.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-23148238693422979962009-07-16T08:03:00.000-05:002009-07-16T08:03:00.314-05:00

Who knew Chuck E Cheese has been around so long? I wonder if Grandpa liked the pizza back then: "Where a child can behave as a ruffian without fear of being flogged" really gets the point across, but I can see why they shortened it over the years.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-3379147033670461522009-07-15T14:50:00.000-05:002009-07-15T14:50:00.454-05:00

Via.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-82737397777760519682009-07-13T10:10:00.000-05:002009-07-13T10:10:00.484-05:00

In a similar vein to the china girl, pro photographers set their lighting and cameras based on reference material. They usually get tossed, but this is the internet: there's a place for everything to get saved:Via.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-47506096516435707252009-07-10T13:19:00.001-05:002009-07-10T13:21:37.120-05:00

Sadly, this would be difficult to do with an ottoman:via

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-1668143293251106922009-07-06T11:33:00.005-05:002009-07-06T11:59:18.184-05:00

I can understand the sentimental value, but, kids, it's time one of you ponied up and bought dear 'ol Dad a real cane:"REWARD!Dear 'ol Dad has misplaced his old field hockey stick he uses for his cane. It has very little monetary value. But HUGE sentimental value. Please help us find it for him.Please call xxx-xxxx or xxx-xxxxThank-you! The Reward is very generous!Seen in that gas station

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-7709305294519925342009-06-29T11:51:00.000-05:002009-06-29T11:51:00.545-05:00

There has been an upset in the world of dogs: the previous Ugliest Dog in the World has been replaced by this guy:Maybe I'm just a dog lover, but I think the guy above is cute -- the previous winner was downright terrifying. Sorry about that...here, have a cutest dog in the world to cleanse your palate.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-77173270161240908772009-06-26T10:31:00.000-05:002009-06-26T10:31:01.831-05:00

The concept meeting started out fine, electing to use interesting stock photos, relevant to corporate and industrial law, to give the website a polished feel. After the wine coolers began to flow, the designers felt something was missing: an iconic, readily identifiable object. The law office is of Bryant Miller Olive needs something for people to recognize...what could it be?"It's sure a good

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-88885822822953012212009-06-24T09:29:00.001-05:002009-06-24T09:29:02.099-05:00

Although, I beg to differ: a Dalek on keytar trumps cybermen guitarists. Sontarans with tambourines are somewhere in between the two, I think.Via.

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-80536000433134846152009-06-22T10:18:00.000-05:002009-06-22T10:18:00.367-05:00

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-51856086187952794412009-06-19T09:58:00.000-05:002009-06-19T09:58:01.065-05:00

Why is it funny? Tragedy, bananas, and funny-looking dogs in human situations. It's a perfect storm of comedy!www.superpoop.com

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-2858761663684145302009-06-15T13:02:00.005-05:002009-06-26T11:08:40.394-05:00

A team of five — five — Guinness Book of World Records adjudicators were on hand in Swansea, South Wales, to count Smurfs:The record, of which there is one already, was broken by 2,510 blue-painted college students; the previous record of around 1,200 was originally held by the Irish, who were unaware of their record because they were more concerned about letting the color-blind guy buy body

Azrael Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09402503172680499188azraelbrown@infomercantile.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2579084138969308799.post-26162593312480090502009-06-12T10:40:00.004-05:002009-06-12T16:22:59.811-05:00

A student was arrested for constructing the safety-reflective giant monster seen below. Before I saw the photo, I was ready for some stupid, sloppily-stacked heap, but his structure is excellent. Hopefully the N.C. DOT will keep it intact and use it to draw attention to construction zone laws; he'd be far better than the talking orange we have around here. More in his Flickr set.Via.

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